2012-6-6 (Today's short story)

            Untitled by Troy Jones.

             Smoke curled up from the cigarette in his fingers. It quiet light the only thing illuminating his face. She watched from across the road. The sign of the petrol station flickering with age and disrepair. Its walls covered in flaking paint and dirty glass.

            His hand slowly reached up pulling the stick to his lips allowing another intake of the smoke. His chest expanded as he took it into is lungs and released into a hacking cough. She pushed the door of the car open. Looking both ways along the deserted road she hurried to his side.

            "Are you okay?"

            The old man turned to her. His weathered hand reaching to grasps hers, “Is that you darlin?"

            "Yeah it's me Pa. Are you okay? You should quite. You know what the doctors said the last time you were there."

            He turned away and back to the door behind. Pulling out keys from his pocket he locked the gas stations door.

            "Doctor's? What do they know? They don't know my life or me. These things are the only things keeping me going." It was an old argument one the two had, had many times before, "Anyway what are you doing here?"

            "It's late and there is a storm on its way. Grandma asked me to pick you up, saves you having to walk in the rain."

            "I would of been fine. A little water ain't hurt nobody."

            "That may be true" Taking his arm and leading him to her pickup "But neither did a car ride"

            "Your Grandmother worries to much, but in 58 years of marriage I have learnt not to anger the women. Lead on young one."

            She walked him the car and helped him inside allowing him enough time for a final puff before he stamped the smoke out. Safely seated inside they pulled out just as the first few drops of rain started to thump on the car. With a purr of the engine they headed south down the road.

            Silence stretched out in front. Familiar and comfortable. The thuds on the roof adding a steady beat to the silent hum of the engine. She griped the leather on the steering wheel. Twin pools of light showing the framed picture the night allowed to illuminate.

            His voice wafted over to her, a gentle blanket in the cold night "So how are things with you?"

            "School is good. We got exams coming up so I thought I would do a quick visit now before I get locked away for the next month with study."

            "A small break then. That’s nice. What about this fella I heard about, did he come down with you?"

            "Dave? No he and I broke up. It's just me now."

            "From the sounds of things he was never right for you. Being a lawyer. Scum is what they all are and they spend much to much time away from home."

            A quiet sob entered her voice "He was a good man. I couldn't fault him for that."

            He turned to stare at his Granddaughter "But there is more to this isn't there? What did he do to you?"

            She laughed at the gruff tone his voice had taken. She could just imagine the two squaring off in a fight against each other. "He didn't do anything wrong Pa. It wasn't him"

            She felt his eyes leave her as he turned to stare back out the window. She turned her focus back to the road, the rain was getting harder now and she needed to really concentrate, but images of the last few months kept creeping in. Her and Dave hardly seeing each other. Texts and emails being the only real for of communication. Her friends birthday party. Having too many beers. Waking up next to a stranger in her bed. The guilt of her actions. The fear of Dave finding out. Then finding out she was pregnant.

            She had come back to her childhood home. Were everything had been safe and easy to decide what she wanted to do.

            It took her a while to register the hand on hers. To feel the callouses and strength ebbing through the fingers gripping hers on the wheel and realise that she was being spoken to. Slowly she pulled over to the side of the road.

            His voice was soft and soothing. One she had heard a hundred times before when he was trying to clam one of their animals down. "It’s okay, you'll be okay. It's all fine." The repetition on the words blended in with the hum and she wiped the unknown tears away from her eyes. When the engine cut off the thunder of the rain on the roof was the only sound until she spoke again. While they sat she poured out the entire story awaiting her grandfathers roar of disapproval. Instead he unbuckled his belt and reached across to hug her. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried the tears she had been holding back for weeks now.

            Finally when it was all over, the tears all gone she started the car and carried on. The only words her Pa had told her is that they would sit together as a family and talk again when they got home. The road the rest of they way in silence. It was until she pulled into the driveway did she notice that the rain had stopped and the first star had decided to peak out from the clouds and shine.

Sappy Mood

I tried for death.

I failed and got a smashed up car.

Is it any wonder that I feel I don’t belong.

Still…

What else can I do except try again.

It's just I promised I wouldn't,

Should my word mean my life must continue?

Should I live with honor?

Will it matter in the place where we all end up?

Story Concept - Extremely Rough

The sleepy town of Alexandera is rocked by the sudden suicide of four student in one night. Each, with their own story leading up to their being bumped off.

James - The school bully, 17 years old and completely self-consciousness. He lives at home with his Dad, a drunk, who is abusive (physical and mental) of him. He hides his shame by taking it out on those around him. Yet while he feels the revenge on his father by dominating those weaker than him he hates it as well because bit by bit he can feel those things that made him the happy nice child, leaving him and being replaced by the venom that is his father. His internal rage at himself and the world takes him to he edge and when confronted by his victims it all becomes to much and he simply just…

Stephanie – 15 year old. At the start of the year Stephanie falls in love with a boy at the school. The romance is intense and very physical. While she falls in love for the first time she doesn’t know that the boy she is with (should it be James?) is filming her the every time they have sex. The boy releases the tape onto the Internet and Stephanie is branded as a slut. Her life spirals down due to the shame and humiliation until it just becomes to much…

Vincent – 14 years old. A gay student. While he tries to hid the fact that he is gay it seems that the people around him do. He is picked on and isolated and marginalized simply for who he likes. Vincent him self is still trying to come to grips with the fact that he is gay. His peers are straight and he has learnt from a very young age that being gay is wrong. So while he cant help feeling the way he does he has to end the war raging in his mind all the while being pressured by the outside world to conform, until it all becomes to much….

Simon – 13 years old. The preverbal geek. Small with a bad haircut and glasses. He is usually a happy young child until he begins his first year at high school. At school he can hid in the class and during lunch he has clubs like chess and computer clubs. But it is the ride home that he is tormented on. The ride is about 20 minutes but for him it is pure torture. In the morning waiting for the bus is even worse. Standing at the bus stop with them while they brown beat him and pick on him. He begs his parents to drive him to school and pick him up but cannot really explain why. Soon his parents do become involved and the school tries to intervene but then the other student retaliate and things become so bad that in the end…

This story highlights the bulling culture and the lack of response by the school authorities.  I don’t know if I want to show the actual suicide but I think I should have a last chapter about the aftermath.

Write a personal story but from a different point of view

"Bed five is awake," called Carol. "You want to go get him sorted". I cocked my head to the screaming that had been coming down the hall for the last half hour.

"Not really". I said

"To bad," Carol said shoving his folder in my hands. "He's your's now get him to shut the hell up. He's freaking everyone out." I grabbed the intake bag and headed down the hall.

In the five years I had worked here I had seen people get checked in some pretty sorry states, this one wasn't any different. They had stripped him and placed him in orderly pants. They were covered in piss and his chest in vomit from the charcoal they had poured down his stomach. His raw throat made a pretty terrible sound and yet he still yelled. He strained and pulled at the restraints on the bed. His back arched, his muscle's tensed. Hadn't they sedated him? I checked the file. With the amount of sedatives they had given him he should of been completely zonked, not like this.

"Quit it, your just going to hurt yourself." 

He shut up and stared at me, taking in my entire 6'2" hight.

I pushed the hair out of my eyes, adjusted the glasses and gave him a couple of minutes to get his head sorted.

"Where am I?" The voice that had been trying to pull the building down with its volume was now barely a whisper.

"Somewhere safe, You had a pretty eventful night."

"I don't remember"

"What do you remember"

He looked out the widow to his right as if he wanted to jump out of it. The only thing getting in or out would be the light.

Finally he answered "I don't know. It's all a jumble."

"Don't worry, you'll get it figured out."

He turned back to me. "Why am I strapped down. Can you let me out"

I checked the chart, "sorry no. You took a swing at a nurse in the ER and you tried to stab your wrist with a scalpel. Your on lock down till the Doc gives the okay."

"Please, I just want to get cleaned up."

"Sorry. Can't let you out. Suicide watch."

"I didn't" he spat at me.

I nodded towards his wrist and for the first time he noticed the bandage there. "I told you, you took a scapel to yourself and that doesn't count to amount of pills found in your system."

"I didn't want to die, I just wanted to sleep."

"Yeah well, if they hadn't restarted your heart you would of been in the longest sleep of your life."

I reached into the bag and pulled out the Blood Pressure Monitor. I strapped the device around his arm and pushed the start. While it ran and whirled I grabbed a cloth and went to the sink in the corner of the room. I wiped off his chest and tried as best I could. "Thanks" came his reply.

tbc

Assignment One: Voices 2012

Oscar nudged my knee and I turned my face towards the automatic door. Momentarily cutting off the low sounds of voices and classical music, and replacing them with the din of the traffic outside. My hands gripped tighter to the coffee cup. It's warmth seeped into the palms of my hand. I took a swig. Dutch courage.

            It was her smell that told me she had arrived at the table. The soft hint of cinnamon and lavender mixed together with a million other things that as men, we aren't supposed to know, but to appreciate and comment on. The memories also came back with that smell. A life that had been filled with laughter, with tears, with passionate kisses and equally passionate arguments. Her smiling face, green eyes and mousey brown hair were centre frame in all those memories. It had been our life. It had been a good life, until...

            The scraping of the chair along the hard floor brought me back to the present and Oscar and I ambled to our feet in a sense of chivalry. Her soft little laugh wafted across the table, as if trying to melt the wall I had spent years building around my heart.

            "You were always such a gentlemen"

            "No, but I always tried"

            "Yes, you did."

A waiter came over, his pen scratching along his note pad.

            "Evening ma'am, would you like a drink?"

            "Yes, white wine"

            "Which one would you like?"

            "Just the house Sav will be fine"

A slight tsk, and some more of the scratching sounds

            "Very good, and sir, another for you?"

A shook my head no, but jerked my thumb at Oscar "But he'll have some water." The waiter huffed for a moment and then just moved off.

            I don’t know how I knew, it’s this new trick I have learnt, but I knew those two were taking the measure of each other.

            "Don't worry, he doesn't bite."

            "How did you…" She trailed on in that surprised tone.

            "Because everyone does the same thing," I said to make her feel at ease. Oscar brushed against my leg as he got up and left me. Her chair scrapped again as it turned.

            "He doesn't talk much, but he knows all his manners."

Oscar let out his usual ‘hello’ grunt and I knew they were shaking hands. Once done, I also knew he would leave her and come sit back beside me.

            "And he is your..?"

            "Friend", I said cutting her off, "Boon, life companion. Its just us now."

The conversation, silence stretched out uncomfortably between us.

            "So have you been?" I volunteered

            "I have been good, the gallery is going well since the remodel and the we have been asked to put on a new show. What about yourself?"

            "Travelling mostly, the books are doing quiet well

“Oh yes, I read them, they were quite wonderful. Better even than I remember.

“I have more time on my hands now to get them right, it’s just writing and touring.

“Touring?

“Promoting my books. I’m told if I do the tour the gimmick of all this helps the sales."

            Her words came out quick and sharp "You are not a gimmick"

Her hand reached out and touched mine. Our first contact in three years and it was like the first time she had touched me all over again. Slow moving electricity flowed up my arm, hairs standing straight up marking her progress. Before it could reach my chest and I jerked my hand back.

            The silence descended on us again. Her finger’s began tapping away on the table in time with the music. An old nervous habit.

            It was her that cracked first this time, "How come you are here, instead of  your place in Newmarket?"

            "I sold it. I spent a year in that place recovering, learning how to live again. I don't want to go back." I couldn't keep the hostility out of my voice.

            "I'm sorry.” Her voice softened, “I tired to visit but I just couldn't..." her voice trailed off.

            "What? You couldn't be with someone like me?" gesturing to my face.

            The soft clink of glass on table brought me back to where I was. Oscar started drinking right away from his water. I quietened but the wall was gone. A quiet anger filled me. I knew this would happen. I should never of agreed to see here again.

            "You weren't the only one to be hurt in that accident you know. It affected all of us." her voice was soft, barely loud enough to be heard.

            "Oh yes, it hurt all of you but I am the only one that has to live permanently with its scars." My hands gripped the edge of the table.

            "I didn't come here for a pity party." She stood and there was more scraping of that damned chair.

            I let out the breath I had been holding. "Sit, please. I'm sorry. It's just being back here has rekindled a lot of the old memories and anger, and I am sorry."

            She sat; I didn't speak as I tried to order my thoughts again. I found my coffee cup and took another swig. The clink of glass let me know she had been doing the same as well.

            "I'm in therapy. I'm trying to deal with it, but it's hard. I know that accident hurt other people but I can't help feeling like I got most of the pain of it. It ruined my life. It ruined us."

            "The accident didn't ruin us, you did.” Her words crashed against me, and the defences shattered like glass. “You were so angry about what had happened, so angry about what you lost that you just angry with everyone. You were in so much pain, but you wouldn't allow anyone near you, to help you. You pushed us away. I didn't leave you because of the crash. I left, because of what you let it turn you into."

            I bowed my head into my hands and for the first time allowed the tears to flow.

            " I know it was my fault, the accident and then afterwards."

            She was by my side. She lifted my glasses and looked into my scared face. Her hands moved over tracing each line and wiping away the tears and this time I didn't recoil from her touch. Instead I reached out and touched her back. The soft smooth velvet skin took me back to nights spent in each other’s arms. I couldn't help but follow the usual curve of her face and down to that long slender neck. I couldn't stop the sensations all came back. Her arms held in tight, palms on either side of my face. My hands on her shoulders slipping down her back till our lips met and the whole world stopped. Her we were again. In our same, old, wonderful positions. I pulled her forward, tiled he head slightly and stopped when I felt the baby in her belly give a tiny kick.

            Slowly I eased back. The walls slowly slipping back into place.

            "Your pregnant"

            "Yeah" She herself pulled back, and I felt when she stopped touching me. We stood.           

            "Congratulations," I stopped talking for a moment, "but wine?"

            "A single glass isn't bad, and it's the first I've had since I found out about him seven months ago. I just needed the courage to see you again."

            A little laugh escaped me, "him? A boy? Whose the father?"

            "A good man, someone I care for deeply."

            A hint of regret entered my voice "You once said that I was the love of your life."

            I could hear the sadness in her voice. "You still are, but you aren't the one I get to spend my life with. Besides you now have Oscar." Oscar grunted as if to acknowledge that statement.

            She touched my shoulder and her lips brushed my cheek. "I have to go now, we should do this again sometime"

            "Absolutely" I said knowing I would never see her again.

            "Goodbye Steven." she said and I could hear the finality in her voice.

            "Goodbye."

She began walking off and for the first time I heard the distinct click of her high heels.

            "Grace," I called after her, the clicking stopped. "For what it worth, that year, losing you, is one of the biggest regrets of my life. I sorry. I am so sorry."

            I never looked back at her and no one told me what she did. All I heard was her walking again and then the sound of cars and she was out of my life. I reached back to the table and grabbed Oscars leash. I unfolded my cane and tapped my way out of the hotel bar and towards the elevators.